Okay, time I shared some of my beanie baby stories with you all! They were a huge part of my childhood and I just have some cute moments I think you guys might like.
First was my first real dive into the bean craze. I was going to the grocery store with my mom and step dad when I saw this dude with a little booth set up outside. He had mountains of beanie babies stacked up on one of those fold out tables. There were so many of them, it was like a dream come true for lil ol’ me! That’s when I saw them, an adorable leopard in a clear acrylic box. I asked my mom kindly if I could buy one, hoping to cash in all my good kid points in that moment. Luckily she said yes, but only if I found a cheap one. This was at the start of the craze back then, so some of the babies had prices as high as $200. I asked the man about the leopard, hoping she’d be less than the others.
I don’t know if she was actually cheap or if the man felt it was worth it to give a kid a discount, but he told me she was only $5. My mom agreed to the price and the man handed me the beanie. Her name was Freckles and I was in love. I took her everywhere with me while I was visiting my mom that summer. I even managed to snag a friend for her, Blizzard the following week. Blizzard was a white tiger and I made them a couple back then. I had no idea what lesbians were but to me, they were Nala and girl Simba and I’d play knock off Lion King all day with them ;o; I even ripped off their tags. I remember my step dad getting mad and my mom asking me if I really wanted to devalue them. I remember saying something super sappy like “I love them so much that I want to play with them. They want to be played with too. So I’m setting them free.” I have no idea why but I vividly remember looking my mom in the eyes with such conviction. I miss that summer, it was a lot of fun.
Another story I remember that also involved my mom was when she tried so hard to win me a beanie baby from her work. She was working at a pizzeria at the time and their boss was doing a ticket giveaway for the workers. You could buy as many tickets as you wanted and the winner would receive a Magic the dragon at the end of the raffle. I don’t know if you guys recall but back then, Magic was worth a ton of money. Now, my mom wasn’t a great mom (well bio mom), but she always wanted to give me the best. I remember we were sitting down, eating dinner after the shop closed one night when she told me she bought $20 worth in tickets. I remember being amazed and so full of love for my mom in that moment. I knew even as a kid that she was doing it for me and that was a lot to risk on a little stuffed dragon.
They ended up doing the drawing a few nights later. I remember eating pizza and looking up at Magic. They were perched on top of the arch that hung over the bar. Sat in an acrylic box with an advertisement for the giveaway inside with them. I remember thinking it looked like Magic was two stories high as a kid, though it was probably more like 10 feet haha. But I was shortly snapped out of my gaze when the manager announced the winner. Sadly, my mom didn’t win, it ended up being some young dude that planned on flipping it for more money. I was sad, but I was still so grateful for my mom putting in the effort to win it for me. We ended up renting a movie that night and I got some cool stickers at the movie shop. We had fun talking about how the guy who won was super lame while I drew drawings of the dragon plush I never got.
The third is less a story and more just a memory. See, I used to live right across from a mall. Like, literally you just walked out the door, crossed the street that was right outside your front door, and bam there’s the mall. Took like three minutes to get from my front door to the mall. Inside this mall was a Hello Kitty store. I looooved that place. So many cute stationary items! But back then, I wasn’t there for Hello Kitty. Because inside the shop was a whole wall dedicated to beanie babies. Quite literally the wall behind the cash register was ceiling to floor covered in beanie babies. Every week my dad would give me $5, and every week I bought a $4 beanie baby. Lordeh I had soooo many beanie babies. I did this for a few years too, I must have amassed at least 60 beanie babies in those days.
I remembered I wanted to rival my friend Gabby, whom of which had a massive collection. Her mom would buy them for her in hopes they would be worth thousands one day. They lined the walls of her room. Heck, her mom would even take the birds and other flying animals and tie them to strings, suspending them from the ceiling. I wanted so badly to beat her collection, in a fun way of course. I don’t know if I ever did, but I sure loved playing with them!
So I had a few people ask me to talk about more of my weird liminal space encounters so I’M GUNNA! Because this stuff means so much to me!
Okay, so this one might be one of my fuzziest yet strongest memories. Once when I was really young and visiting my mom in Oregon, I was left to hang out with some random kids. I don’t think I knew them really, just some random kids from a neighborhood. Again, really shocked I was never abducted, the 90s were different. I remember one kid was older than I was and the other kid was around my age. I must have been about six or seven at the time. Anyways, the older kid, let’s call him Harold, told the younger kid, let’s say Timmy, and I that there was an arcade near by and we should go there to win some prizes and play some games.
Me, being a naïve kid, didn’t even think twice about asking an adult or even questioning what we’d do there without money. I just blindly followed Harold, but boy was I glad that I did. Again, it’s vague, but I remember walking down this path behind the houses. It was just a long stretch of grass leading to a hill with a gate at the top. It was so surreal, it looked a lot like this:
I barely remember the trip to the arcade other than it was most likely a Chuck E. Cheese. All I remember is we managed to split a dollar between us and we found some tokens laying around. In the end I won a ton of tickets playing the quarter flip game. You know, the dinosaur one with the volcano? I remember getting a ton of bracelets and vampire fangs. But the only other thing I remember is playing with our toys on the way home and stopping to hang out in an abandoned house. We talked about making it our clubhouse and grandiose dreams of decorating it. Something about each of us getting our own corner in our own color. But when my mom eventually picked me up, I never saw those kids again. I never did make a sweet clubhouse either, but it was fun to dream.
I wish it wasn’t so vague, I almost wonder if it wasn’t a dream. It’s so vivid though, something I see so strongly in my mind’s eye. Especially the houses. They were so perfect and colorful, reminded me of a scene from a Dr. Sues movie. It also makes me so sad to know that things are so different now. I miss feeling safe enough to enter a random house, to hang out with kids I never met before. It’s moments like this I miss a lot from childhood.
Hey all! This post will be dedicated to logging progress made on my new art station. The majority of my free money is going to upgrading this area so that I have a comfortable space to do my work in. As of now, I only have a small computer desk that is not very stable for projects outside of digital work. I hope to use this area to work on traditional art, draw on my ipad, and begin work on crafts to sell in my shop!
I want to be transparent as possible so people know that I’m not wasting this money on anything other than this area and things like food/rent. Plus it helps both you guys and myself visualize the goal! It’s always nice to see where your money is going to when you donate/help people out!
If you’d like to donate, consider donating to my kofi or purchasing art packs from my gumroad(s)
I know it might seem trivial, but that LED strip is a life saver. I have no celling lights in my house. When I work on traditional art, having a light source from above is essential. Other lights cause a massive shadow to be casted over the area I’m working in. I’ve tried lamps but nothing fits on the desk or just takes up room.
This was the biggest roadblock so far. I have a /ton/ of scrapbook paper I really need to have displayed. It’s a huge waste of time having to flip through my 10+ pads of paper to find a pattern I need, especially when I need to use several pieces for one project. I really needed something to display them that stacked and didn’t take up too much room. I bought these from the dollar tree as they said they were 12×12 online. Sadly they were not, they were 12×9.
Even worse, they could not be returned and I ordered 24 of them (I needed 18 and could only order in amounts of 12). I was at a loss of what to do until I figured out a solution. I donated all but two to my family member’s school. I figured teachers have it hard, I’m sure some would appreciate free paper trays.
I /finally/ found some paper holders made for 12×12 scrapbooking paper. Sadly these were VERY expensive. They’re designed to be used with IKEA bookshelves and are made of pure, solid wood. Each one ran about $120. Though expensive, they were literally the only option and they work perfectly! Nano and I tried making out own holders but absolutely nothing worked. At least I’m done with this step.
Sticker books came in! As I’m sure a few of you have seen, I have an outrageous amount of stickers in my life. I use them for crafts but as of the past 10+ years, I’ve kept my massive collection in various plastic, ziplock bags. It’s such a pain to have to drag all my bags out, dig through them and sift through dozens of sheets just to find the one I’m looking for. So I finally decided I’ve had enough and I got some sticker books with help from selling art packs! They’re soooo nice. I can finally just look through them and pick out the stickers I want! Sadly I’m going to need like, 10 of these, but I’m also trying to make my own books for my smaller stickers. Wish me luck!
Finally going to reply to a few of these. I know I’ve been behind but I feel like I’m both free enough and in a better place right now to answer these questions! Remember, you can ask me anything, either anonymously or openly, right here: Ask Me Anything – Bluffington
Yes I do! I haven’t had many questions yet minus a creep sending me threats and harassing me. He seems to have stopped however. This is the main reason I haven’t gone through these all yet. Was a lot of spam to sift through.
Personally, diapers don’t play a big role in my little side. For a while there I was very unsure as to where my little side fell. But now that I’m beginning to experiment more and test the waters, I do think I switch a little, but I’m mostly a kid regressor vs a baby regressor. As for advice, best thing I can say is to just try it out a little at a time. Maybe something as small as grabbing a “little” snack like Danimals or one of those apple sauce squeeze pouches. If you find yourself enjoying it more, go a little further. Buy yourself a plushie, get a paci, anything that you feel comfortable with. Then on top of that, I just advise chilling out and reading some blogs about regressors. Try Fetlife or even Tumblr! I follow a lot of regression blogs on Tumblr and they’re so much fun and help me get into the little mood. Maybe it will help you too!
For starters, nothing made me want to be an artist, I’ve been drawing since I had the ability to. My parents still have drawings I did when I was 2-3. As for what got me into drawing diapers, I guess it was just natural. As I’ve mentioned on this blog before, I’ve always had an interest in them since I was a little kid. I kinda got over it when I got a little older, but meeting furries who had interests in diapers made me want to pick it up again. I’m also happy to hear you like my dragons! I spend a lot, and I mean a lot of time drawing. Everyone is bound to get good at something they put work and effort into after time!
Oh man, yes. I used to be an avid reader. Sadly I lack the free time now a days, but I try to when I can. I know it’s already popular, but I always advise the Warrior Cats books. It’s cheesy at times and there has been a few mistakes here and there, but over all it’s just harmless fun. It’s about cats who live in different clans that are always on the brink of war as well as their struggles within their clans and nature. Each series usually has it’s big story and theme with small branching moments. Lots of sadness, edge and drama.
Next series would be the Redwall series, especially with a new Netflix show on the horizon. Though it’s a series, very few of the books follow one another. More like a book series on a world vs characters. Each book is about a different character or cast and their struggle against some force of evil. It’s very medieval in theme with stories of swords, defending castles, overthrowing evil kings and so on. It’s very whimsical but also enthralling.
Last I’ll advise is also a series of sorts, but not to the degree of the other two above. The first book is called “Firebringer.” It’s about a deer with the power of the Sight who was born into a prophecy to lead his herd and to remove an evil ruler. His power gives him subtle but special abilities as he uses them and his friends to help guide him to resolve the prophecy. It’s very dark and eerie, think “Watership Down” but with deer. It’s my favorite book of all time.
My close second favorite book is its successor, “The Sight”. This book goes more into the power of the Sight, which the book mentions all animals once had. It’s about a pair of wolf siblings, Larka and Fell, who are both the main characters in a new prophecy. Larka must make it to a very specific place in the world before an evil wolf, Morgana, uses the power of the Sight to take over both the world of the living and the dead. The wolves and their family set out on a journey to protect the two pups and to put a stop to Morgana. It sounds dumb but it’s so moving and it really shaped who I was growing up. There is a sequel book as well, Fell, which I started reading but never finished.
And that’s it for this mail bag! Feel free to ask me anything! If it’s a really good question, I might just make a whole post about it!
I went with Nano for a ride to get some food tonight. I’m a little too high and he didn’t sleep well last night so we decided to get some fast-food. We tried a few places but everything was closed. So Nano decided to go to the Jack In The Box across town. I agreed and just decided to lay back and chill. The road we take is a very secluded one. Long stretch with nothing but street lights. Something about watching them pass by with the window down in the summer just reminded me of being a little kid.
I used to go camping a lot when I was little. When we’d drive home, it was always in the evening, and it took us a few hours to get back. Naturally by time we were getting close to home, it’d be dark outside. I remember it so vividly. In the car as my dad drove home after a weekend of hikes and boat fishing. Old 80s rock on the radio and just chilling to the thoughts of what I’m going to do when I get home.
I’m thinking of all the fun I’m going to do with my toys when the trip’s over. If we get home soon enough my favorite show Kablam might still be on. I can’t wait to tune into a repeat of the latest episode while I count my Pokemon cards. Maybe I’ll even bust the dinosaurs out and reenact Land Before Time. Or maybe, if it’s during summer break, I can stay up all night and watch Animal Planet, at least until the infomercials come on. Then I’ll switch to Space Ghost: Coast to Coast while I drift off to sleep on the couch. My dad told me not to, but he doesn’t know I purposefully fell asleep out here. But first, before I can sleep, I gotta close my ears and hum to myself for a little. The intro to Space Ghost really scares me for some reason. Now that it’s over though, I giggle as I start to fade. The host I know nothing about is the last thing I hear before I fall asleep.
A few hours later, my dad is waking me up. We have to take my uncle to the bus stop so he can go to work at the toy factory. When I was younger, he’d pick me up and lay me in the back seat of his truck. I’m older now so I can carry myself, but I’m still too young to stay home, so in the car I go. Again I am treated to the nostalgic site of the street lights passing by as we drive across town to the park-n-ride. The fog outside makes it look like a scene from Silent Hill. It’s all so oddly calming. I almost fall back asleep but I want to stay awake long enough to watch the lights for a little longer. Knowing I’ll have plenty of time to sleep when I get home.
I know it sounds silly, but simple moments like the passing of street lamps in the calm of the night just makes me feel like a little kid again. I’m glad it’s something I still get to experience.
So this is a bit random, but I wanted to share a little bit about my love for liminal spaces.
When I was young, I spent a lot of time in Oregon. My parents split when I was one and my mother moved to Oregon a few years after their break up. I only visited during vacations and spent all my time in school with my dad. I haven’t been there to visit my mom since I was eight but I still have so many memories of life there. So many of them are vague but I’d thought I’d share anyways.
While this isn’t a story specifically, it has to do with my time in Oregon. Specifically reasons why I relate so many of my outgoings as a child to liminal spaces. I think it’s because when I was in Oregon, I spent a lot of time just running around. A mix of it was different back then and my mom was a sucky parent.
I mention this because I went everywhere in Oregon. I would go into neighbors homes to say hello, I’d go into stores, I’d visit friends and walk around their neighborhoods. I also entered a lot of abandoned places as a kid, I was fearless, but I think due to running around Oregon, I’ve been exposed to a bunch of different settings in a small amount of time. I think it somehow gives me a vague sense of seeing all these places before when I look at images dumbed “liminal spaces”.
I think this is why I love liminal spaces so much. Seeing those eerie pictures just makes me think of my times as a kid, especially (but not limited to) in Oregon. It brings back good memories of better times. Because even if my mom gave me the Rugrats parent treatment, I still had an amazing childhood filled with adventures. People were nicer back then it seemed. I remember making drawings and giving them to people in my mom’s neighborhood. People would just invite me in, give me a treat and let me go about on my way.
One of the big outings I remember was going to my Mom’s wedding. It was by a lake and all the kids were told to run around until the wedding was ready to start. Things were different back then for reals. I can’t remember clearly because I was so young, six or so, but there was an office near by. Something most parks have on the premise, with a little secretary and front entrance area. I just remember us going inside and sneakily running amuck. Looking back on it, all I imagine are “the backrooms”, very creepy and so vast as a child. Even the area outside the office seemed otherworldly back then. Little areas clearly put aside for things like parties or weddings. Empty tables and seats, small hedge mazes with no one around, small walking gardens filled with silence. When we were kids, we thought it was a magical place.
Another big one is the time I spent visiting my friends Amy and Ashley. They lived on a HUGE farm where their parents grew all sorts of fruits and vegetables. Their backyard was like a massive orchard, but more chaotic. All the trees were in random spots instead of little rows. We’d always run around outside, climbing the trees and eating all the fruit we wanted. They had lots of little sheds and green houses around, most of which were lost to time. Again looking back on it, all I can think of is liminal spaces. It really seamed like time stood still back then. Like when we were playing, we were actually stepping into a different reality.
I just had so many moments like that as a kid, if anyone is interested, I’d love to share more. Abandoned homes, shopping areas after closing, ghost towns, I have a lot to tell!
So after asking Nano about 100 times if I was too embarrassing, I finally worked up the courage to start carrying a plush with me in public. It’s been something I’ve wanted to do for years now. I’ve been inspired both by people I follow who are brave enough to carry their plushies around as well as a lot of people who manage to take adorable photoshoots with their plush pals. It looked like lots of fun, so I decided if they could do it, so could I! That and Nano always encourages me!
So for my first day of plushing in public, I decided to take my new Kougra with me while Nano and I went to the store. His name is KidZone or K.Z. for short! I decided to take him with me since I just got him the other day. Well that and because he’s going to need a bath tomorrow anyways. So I saddled him up in my favorite wolf bag and we were off! We ended up at Walmart which honestly, isn’t my favorite store, but we had to drop off rent and it was right next door. Oh well, we made the best of it!
K.Z. was a big help picking out bananas, so we decided to let him pick out a snack to share. Then we got some Dairy Gold, yum! Only the best chocolate milk ever! After that we decided to let K.Z. try out some of the baby stuff. Strollers, walkers, playpens and more! Was a great time shopping with my new buddy. I was a little scared but with help from Nano and K.Z., I didn’t feel so weird. Can’t wait to take more plushies on adventures with me!
So recently, Nano and our two friends, Uji and Peddy, all took a trip to Farmer’s Market and the Boulevard. I’ve been really itching to go to the sticker store for a while so we decided, why not make a day of it?
It was loads of fun. Upon arriving and meeting up with Peddy and Uji, we all decided on getting some lunch first. Nano went with the diner restaurant, grabbing a philly cheesesteak sandwich and fries while the rest of us stopped by the Gumbo Pot for some Cajun food! Peddy and I got the gumbo and jambalaya, my favorite at the market, while Uji got the blackened salmon. Everything was spot on and delicious. Once done, we decided to peruse the wares while we waited on our stomachs to lighten up.
Peddy and I stopped for some waffle shots while browsing. Basically these cute waffle shot cups filled with your choice of coffee. We both went with a macchiato shot, his in a chocolate hazelnut cup and mine in a cookies and cream one. The coffee was great and the cups were a lightly sweet treat. The chocolate inside melting with the coffee made for a good final sip.
Upon finishing our drinks, we took a look inside a near by shop that offered fancy things like imported treats and wine. We weren’t really looking to buy but it was fun non the less, especially gawking at the $1500 aged vinegar. Afterwards, Nano and I made a mad dash for the sticker store. It’s been a favorite of mine since I was a wee child and I was eager to get some choice stickers for new projects. I’ve been wanting to use stickers to make collage pieces for art, both for myself and for others. I knew this store had some rare pieces you simply cannot buy in normal stores. That is unless, you wanted to pay up to $20 for them on ebay as many of the stickers they offer in the store are out of print and hard to come by. Luckily there would be no need since I was able to grab all the stickers I came for. There were a few, choice customers in the store. They were, how to put it, like teenagers written by adults. Though annoying, they were having fun. Even if they were a tad obnoxious, I’m glad they were enjoying themselves like we were. Let’s just say though, I was happy when I made my final purchase and could leave the excited shouts of “that’s so totally a spongebob meme rofl”.
Once the stickers were in hand, we met back up with Uji and Peddy and decided to grab some ice-cream before heading outside of the market. The place we bought from, Bennett’s Ice Cream, is another life long favorite of mine. All hand made with natural ingredients and you could taste it. Was a great way to top off the meal earlier. Then once we finished our dessert, it was off to the boulevard! First stop was the World Market. This shop is usually filled with lots of home interior items, but I was after their usually large selection of imported goodies. Sadly it seemed like they downsized in the food department during covid, but at least they had two of the things I wanted most. Crawtator and Salsitas spicy salsa chips. These are sold in the US but are extremely rare. Needless to say I bought six bags worth haha.
After the World Market it was back to the boulevard. We mostly just walked around a bit, not really going in anywhere specific. The only place we managed to go inside of was Barnes and Noble and Gap. This B&N was massive! Three stories tall and tons of items to check out. Lots of silly fun was had browsing the books. I personally love B&N since I spent tons of time inside of them as a kid and teen. Being inside the bookstore always makes me nostalgic and inspired. Plus, I actually got some Pokemon cards there!
Gap was a good amount of fun as well. Nano and I were a bit sad we didn’t have time to make it back to the market to pick up some produce and meat to go, but it was still a good time. We mostly watched Peddy try on several shorts but in all, was a nice break from walking all day. Then, when all the shorts were purchased, we decided on eating dinner at the Umami Burger joint down the road. It was sooooo good. I’ve never had it before and was pleasantly surprised. I got the K-Town burger, a hamburger with a slice of poke belly and slaw on top. It was tasty but also humanizing to be able to sit in a restaurant for the third time this year. Luckily we were all vaccinated and the inside dining was empty compared to the large groups eating outside.
In the end, after all the shopping and dinner was done, we parted ways with Peddy and Uji. It was a lot of fun, Nano and I rarely hang with the two of them alone without other friends. Though I missed our other friends, sometimes really small meetings are enjoyable in their own right.
I’m already eager to head back in June. I only hope I can grab more food UwU
I feel like adding this since people don’t seem to be understanding haha.
I don’t dislike adult art. I don’t dislike drawing it. I am going to continue making it, just not on my Carnival account for a while, at least not openly. Also no one is to blame. Don’t beat yourself up for my burnout. You guys had no idea I felt this way so you did nothing wrong!
The issue I face with adult art is that when I was drawing both adult art and clean art, people only cared about the adult stuff. Like I get it, sex sells, but it’s not the only thing I’m into. And even when all the art wasn’t mature, it had lots of mature undertones or was all heavily DL related and not the AB and clean babyfur stuff I enjoy drawing. It felt like no one was really there for my wholesome art first and my sexy art second.
It’s like this. It’s like owning a store where you sell both muffins and donuts equally. But since donuts are trendy and more well known and liked, people only ever come in for the donuts and just gloss over the muffins, not giving them a second thought. Sure some people buy the muffins, but only after buying a dozen donuts, and after I listed the muffins at 50% off.
I have this issue with everything I draw. I end up doing one thing, that thing is popular, then it’s all people want from me all the time. It’s all I have to show, it’s all people share, and it’s all people see. How are people supposed to know that I’m not into it when it’s all they see? How are they to know I like cute wholesome art when there’s only one wholesome image per seventy two dirty ones in my gallery? This is why I am cutting it off for now. I will still be drawing it, but on my terms. Mostly through YCHs or the random slot here and there.
So please, stop assuming I dislike adult content. Stop messaging me getting upset because I said I want to cut back. I never said I hated it, I never said I never want to draw it ever again. I simply want to take a break until I’m known for more than mature and DL diaper art.
Long story short, I’m just at my breaking point. It’s not because of anyone in particular or any one incident, but I am just sick of where I am in art. I haven’t been happy with it for a long time. I addressed it in my last post but it’s just the accumulation of a lot of things. Long story short: I’m not in love with my current style and I want to change it, but if I do, I fear it will cause backlash. I want to focus more on artistic freedom commissions and less mature images but I worry people wont commission me with those stipulations. I want to work more on improving but can’t practice on commissions.
So basically, I just want to change but commissions are my livelihood. I’m not in a place where I can take a break from working. So honestly, I’m going to attempt to see if people will accept my new ideas and art style. I’d love to make the change to my new content because drawing it really does make me very happy.
If you are reading this and you’re interested in a commission, please do know that I’m in a period of transition. I’m working on changing things in my art so it might not always be super consistent. But if you’re okay with that, I’d love sharing my new style with people!
Also I do want to say that I’m not saying I don’t plan on coming back to my old style, not at all. I just want to experiment. Doing commissions full time and never doing personal work or having time for it has left me very rusty. I no longer take time to practice and improve because my whole day is dedicated to commissions. So I just want a little bit of a break is all, but a long break. After I get some fresh air in me and a new perspective on art, I am sure I will come back to my old style and be better than ever.